Requests and permission

To ask someone to do something, take the te-form and add ください (kudasai): 書いて (kaite) → 書いてください (kaite kudasai), please write. Things you want are asked for with a noun and をください (o kudasai) or をお願いします (o onegai shimasu).

～てください is polite but direct. It's the normal form for instructions, from a doctor, a teacher or hotel staff, and for small everyday requests. Start with すみません (sumimasen) or add ちょっと (chotto), a little, to make it gentler. Between friends and family, the te-form alone is enough: 待って (matte), wait.

To ask someone not to do something, take the plain negative and add ～でください (-de kudasai): 飲まない (nomanai) → 飲まないでください (nomanaide kudasai), please don't drink. In casual speech, ～ないで (-naide) alone is used, often with ね (ne): 忘れないでね (wasurenaide ne), don't forget.

To ask permission, take the te-form and add もいいですか (mo ii desu ka), literally “is it all right even if I …?”: 座ってもいいですか (suwatte mo ii desu ka), may I sit down? More polite is ～てもよろしいですか (-te mo yoroshii desu ka); between friends, ～てもいい？ (-te mo ii?).

To say yes: はい、どうぞ (hai, dōzo) or ええ、いいですよ (ē, ii desu yo). A soft no is すみません、ちょっと… (sumimasen, chotto…), trailing off. Rules and prohibitions use ～てはいけません (-te wa ikemasen), you must not, which is strong; on signs and from staff you'll more often hear ～ないでください.

When you ask someone for a favour, especially a stranger, a customer or a superior, ～てください can sound too direct. Instead, ask whether you can receive the action: ～てもらえますか (-te moraemasu ka), could you …?, or, more politely, ～ていただけますか (-te itadakemasu ka). Asking in the negative is softer still: ～ていただけませんか (-te itadakemasen ka), ～ていただけないでしょうか (-te itadakenai deshō ka).

Among friends, use ～てくれる？ (-te kureru?) or ～てくれない？ (-te kurenai?), will you …? The table goes from casual to very polite.