Chinese · Intermediate (B1) · Chapter 4 of 12
Feelings and relationships
心情和关系Xīnqíng hé guānxi
Talk about feelings in Chinese, say what made you sad or angry with 让, use 互相 for “each other”, and give a friend advice.
In this chapter you'll learn to
- Say how you feel and what made you feel that way
- Say who you are angry with or fought with
- Talk about doing things for each other with 互相 (hùxiāng)
- React to news and give a friend advice
Listen
In their flat in Chengdu, Jiang Xue sees that her flatmate Du Juan is upset after a fight with her boyfriend. Listen to the whole dialogue first, then line by line.
Jiang Xue
小娟，你怎么了？心情不好吗？
Xiǎo Juān, nǐ zěnme le? Xīnqíng bù hǎo ma?
Juan, what's wrong? Are you in a bad mood?
Du Juan
我跟男朋友吵架了。我现在很生气，也很难过。
Wǒ gēn nánpéngyou chǎojià le. Wǒ xiànzài hěn shēngqì, yě hěn nánguò.
I had a fight with my boyfriend. I'm really angry, and sad too.
Jiang Xue
真的吗？为什么？你们不是很好吗？
Zhēn de ma? Wèishénme? Nǐmen bú shì hěn hǎo ma?
Really? Why? I thought you two were fine.
Du Juan
昨天是我生日。他说七点来，可是九点才来，也没给我打电话。
Zuótiān shì wǒ shēngrì. Tā shuō qī diǎn lái, kěshì jiǔ diǎn cái lái, yě méi gěi wǒ dǎ diànhuà.
Yesterday was my birthday. He said he'd come at seven, but he didn't turn up until nine, and he didn't call me either.
Jiang Xue
这件事让你很失望吧。
Zhè jiàn shì ràng nǐ hěn shīwàng ba.
That must have really disappointed you.
Du Juan
是啊。我对他很生气，说了很多不好听的话。然后他也生气了。
Shì a. Wǒ duì tā hěn shēngqì, shuōle hěn duō bù hǎotīng de huà. Ránhòu tā yě shēngqì le.
Yes. I was so angry with him that I said a lot of unkind things. Then he got angry too.
Jiang Xue
他为什么九点才到？是不是公司有事？
Tā wèishénme jiǔ diǎn cái dào? Shì bu shì gōngsī yǒu shì?
Why didn't he get there until nine? Was something going on at work?
Du Juan
他说他得加班，手机也没电了。
Tā shuō tā děi jiābān, shǒujī yě méi diàn le.
He says he had to work late, and his phone battery was dead.
Jiang Xue
那可能是个误会。其实他很关心你，你们应该互相理解。
Nà kěnéng shì ge wùhuì. Qíshí tā hěn guānxīn nǐ, nǐmen yīnggāi hùxiāng lǐjiě.
Then it might be a misunderstanding. He really does care about you. You should try to understand each other.
Du Juan
可是他到现在都没跟我道歉。我很担心他不想跟我在一起了。
Kěshì tā dào xiànzài dōu méi gēn wǒ dàoqiàn. Wǒ hěn dānxīn tā bù xiǎng gēn wǒ zài yìqǐ le.
But he still hasn't apologised to me. I'm worried he doesn't want to be with me any more.
Jiang Xue
别难过。干吗不给他打个电话？你们好好聊聊。
Bié nánguò. Gànmá bù gěi tā dǎ ge diànhuà? Nǐmen hǎohāo liáoliao.
Don't be sad. Why don't you give him a call? You two should have a proper talk.
Du Juan
你说得对。我也有不对的地方。如果他跟我道歉，我就原谅他。
Nǐ shuō de duì. Wǒ yě yǒu bú duì de dìfang. Rúguǒ tā gēn wǒ dàoqiàn, wǒ jiù yuánliàng tā.
You're right. I wasn't completely right either. If he apologises, I'll forgive him.
Understand
Talking about feelings
Feelings work like other adjectives: use (hěn) or another word before them, and no (shì): (wǒ hěn nánguò), I'm sad. For a change of feeling, add (le) at the end: (tā yě shēngqì le), he got angry too.
To say what made you feel something, use (ràng) + person + feeling: (zhè jiàn shì ràng wǒ hěn shīwàng), this made me very disappointed.
The person you feel something towards goes before the feeling, never after it. You are angry with someone: (duì tā shēngqì). You fight or apologise with someone: (gēn tā chǎojià), (gēn tā dàoqiàn).
| Chinese | Meaning |
|---|---|
| (gāoxìng) | happy, glad |
| (nánguò) | sad, upset |
| (shēngqì) | angry |
| (dānxīn) | worried; to worry about |
| (shīwàng) | disappointed |
| (zháojí) | anxious, stressed (in a hurry) |
互相: each other
English puts “each other” after the verb. Chinese puts (hùxiāng) before the verb: (wǒmen hùxiāng bāngzhù), we help each other. (nǐmen yīnggāi hùxiāng lǐjiě), you should understand each other.
The subject must be two or more people: (wǒmen), (nǐmen), (tāmen), or two names joined with (hé).
- 我们常常互相发消息。Wǒmen chángcháng hùxiāng fā xiāoxi.We often send each other messages.
- 邻居应该互相帮助。Línjū yīnggāi hùxiāng bāngzhù.Neighbours should help each other.
- 他们互相看了看，都笑了。Tāmen hùxiāng kànle kàn, dōu xiào le.They looked at each other and both laughed.
Reacting and giving advice
When a friend tells you some news, react with (zhēn de ma?), really?, (zěnme le?), what's wrong?, or (bié nánguò), don't be sad.
For advice, you know (nǐ yīnggāi …), you should. Softer ways are (nǐ zuìhǎo …), you'd better, and (yàobù nǐ …), how about you… (gànmá bù …?) means “why don't you…?”. It's informal, so use it only with friends and family.
(hǎohāo) + verb means “properly, really well”: (nǐmen hǎohāo liáoliao), have a proper talk. (hǎohāo xiūxi), get some good rest.
More in the grammar: Doubling words: 看看, 试试, 高高兴兴
New words
- 心情xīnqíngmood · (xīnqíng bù hǎo), in a bad mood
- 男朋友nánpéngyouboyfriend · girlfriend: (nǚpéngyou)
- 吵架chǎojiàto quarrel, to have a row · (gēn … chǎojià), to fight with someone
- 生气shēngqìangry; to get angry · (duì … shēngqì), angry with someone
- 难过nánguòsad, upset
- 失望shīwàngdisappointed · (shēngrì), birthday: (zuótiān shì wǒ shēngrì), yesterday was my birthday
- 误会wùhuìmisunderstanding; to misunderstand
- 关心guānxīnto care about, to be concerned about
- 互相hùxiāngeach other · before the verb: (hùxiāng bāngzhù), help each other
- 理解lǐjiěto understand (a person or a reason) · for words and languages, use (dǒng)
- 道歉dàoqiànto apologise · (gēn … dàoqiàn), to apologise to someone
- 担心dānxīnto worry; worried · (bié dānxīn), don't worry
- 好好hǎohāoproperly, well, to the full · before a verb: (hǎohāo xiūxi)
- 原谅yuánliàngto forgive
Practise
1.How do you say “The news made us very happy”?
2.Put the words in order.
Tap the words below in the right order.You should understand each other.
3.Match the feelings with their meanings.
Pick a word on the left, then its meaning on the right.
4.How do you say “She's angry with me”?
5.Your friend is worried about an exam tomorrow. Which is the best thing to say?
6.Du Juan's boyfriend was two hours late. Put the words in order.
Tap the words below in the right order.This really disappointed me.
0 of 6 exercises done.
Say it out loud
你怎么了？
Nǐ zěnme le?
What's wrong?
Listen, then say it out loud, as close to the recording as you can.
Check
Five questions on this chapter. Then mark it as finished to add its words to your review deck.
0 of 5 answered.